No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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