he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
