The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
