butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I just had sex on a roof
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
