I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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