Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
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