i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize