No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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