Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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