i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Do vagina's smell?
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
