Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize