please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
