Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
