im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
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