Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
