You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
