make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
