His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
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