I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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