Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
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