normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
