I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
