fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
