your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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