Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Randomize
