their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
At least make sure they are 18
Why
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
