let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Randomize