They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
