i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Randomize
