your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
