when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Randomize