he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
