I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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