Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Randomize
