I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
