Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
