I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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