Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
