I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize