i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
