chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Who died my cat blue again?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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