i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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