so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
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