But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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