Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
