I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
