thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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