I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
