Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize