he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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