just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
